book 4

Before you mention it, I’ll apologize. i ought to have published this post on the 1st of November-my bad. Please forgive me. I didn’t forget but i didn’t exactly make out time from my schedule to get this done on time. Thanks for forgiving me ;0) Well as the title of this post goes,I’m going to be sharing with you some of the important lessons i picked out from some of my most favorite books. Since much of the original draft turned out to be very long, i decided to just divide ‘my confessions’ into as many parts as would allow me cover at least five books, with each part not being too long so i don’t run the risk of boring you.

I’m a bookworm- at least to most of the people who know me personally. I love to read and i make no apologies for loving to do so. I would say that much of the knowledge i have about life and the way things work in general have come from my personal study of spiritual/self-help/motivational/personal development etc book .  I discovered my love for self-help, motivational, personal development etc book while in my second year in University. During the annual ‘week of spiritual emphasis’ program, our chancellor-Bishop David Oyedepo, kept mentioning that he read and wrote everyday. The more he said it, the more i wondered what was in all these books that he was reading. So, after one of those church services, I decided to buy some of those books to satisfy my curiosity. The first two books I got were Pastor Sam Adeyemi’s ‘Parable of Dollars’ and Bishop Oyedepo’s ‘Walking in the miraculous’. Yet, though i can’t remember exactly what i learnt from both books (sometimes its difficult to articulate the exact things you learnt from a book), I do remember that I found both books so insightful and interesting that I have to date bought and read over a hundred such books in the past seven years.

Having read several books, I have found that there are some which have greatly influenced the course of my life by virtue of the ideas and wisdom that their authors shared in such books. What comes below, is a short summary of some of the life changing ideas i have drawn from 10 such books (arranged in no particular order) and how those ideas have influenced my choices and actions so far. i hope you learn from these lessons too *winks*.

BOOK 1#LADY IN WAITING# by Jackie kendall and Debby Jones

LIW This book is very dear to my heart. The first thing i remember learning from it was…”there’s no hurry about getting into a romantic relationship. Regardless of what others say or do, a godly woman never frets over the absence of a romantic interest in her life, neither does she blindly rush into an intimate relationship with’ just-any interested man’ simply because she’s desperate for a man’s attention or feels lonely”. Mind you, I’m not in any way quoting verbatim any of the books i’ll be talking about, just summarizing the most important ideas i drew out from them in my own words. So back to this book. Six solid years have passed since i first read this book and the pressure to be in a romantic relationship has only but grown in a certain way over the years. BUT even then, I keep remembering Jackie and Debby’s advice to wait and let God do the finding and directing when it comes to giving my heart away. Hence, glory to God, over the years I’ve found the strength and grace to keep my eyes on Jesus and not waste precious time worrying over when ‘mr right’ would show up. Cos he will when it’s our heavenly father’s time-kapish!

The second idea i drew from this book was the idea that..”if a single, available, desirable (i said it #laughs#) man in your life, keeps doing things that connotes he’s interested in you in a ‘special way’ BUT HE DOES NOT at any time EXPRESSLY say he’s romantically interested in you. then don’t waste your time fantasizing that he is interested in pursuing a romantic relationship with you because he isn’t.” OMG! as a lady who by God’s grace has been surrounded by godly gentlemen in the past six to seven years, this advice has saved me needless heart ache over and over again. Knowing fully well that when a man has something to say, he’ll say it, has freed me to receive the friendly attention and care of godly men who treated me even more honorable than some guys treat their girl friends without secretly fantasizing that their show of agape love was some indication that they were in some way romantically interested in me. If you are a lady reading this, take this advice and don’t give room for unnecessary fantasies over the possibility of a romantic relationship with a man/guy who isn’t saying any thing to that effect. Forget about how nice he treats you. He ought to treat you that way because you are royalty not just because he hopes to pursue a romantic relationship with you. Yes, I know its possible that he may be thinking of ‘asking you out’ but since he hasn’t said anything specific, you are better off assuming that he isn’t interested in you in that way so you don’t give him your heart needlessly, only to be crushed when he turns up with a beautiful damsel swinging from his arm as his girlfriend/his fiance. A word they say is enough for the wise.

The third idea i gleaned from this book, is closely related to the second but is a little more like a rule to guide a woman’s actions when she finds herself developing romantic feelings for a desirable yet not-forth coming man and the rule is “NEVER do for a brother, what you would not do for a sister’. Let me explain that a little further. As women, we like to go the extra mile for the people we love or care about. So when there’s a man in our lives who isn’t exactly pursuing us but seems to be treating us  in a special way that could connote some form of a romantic interest, there’s a tendency that we would go out of our way to do things for the him with the hopes that by our action, he would see that we really care about him .

Well my dear sister, let Jackie and Debbie’s voices and the testimonials of the many women they have counseled forewarn Don’t ‘mis-invest’ your energy by inconveniencing yourself just to meet a man’s every need in the hopes that he will notice that you really care about him. He’s a man and if he isn’t interested in you romantically at the start, his intentions towards you might not change even after all your many sacrifices. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying you shouldn’t be nice or kind to the men in your life or especially to one you think you’re interested in. No. All i’m saying Jackie & Debbie advised (and i agree with) in this book, is that you shouldn’t make sacrifices for a man JUST IN THE HOPES that he would learn to love you because of your sacrifices. That’s a game of chance you shouldn’t even bother to play with your heart cos it may not work. Whenever he asks for a favor from you, let the rule ‘NEVER do for a brother what you will not do for a sister’ inform your decision as to whether or not you would do him the favor. If you would comfortably do the favor being asked fro a sister in the lord then by all means be kind to your brother in the Lord and help him but if your only reason for wanting to go out of your way to help him is because you hope it would help win his exclusive affections, then don’t do him the favor.


gods planI got this book as a gift from a friend for no special reason. it wasn’t my birthday and i’m not sure if and when i mentioned to him that i would love to read the book, but he got it for me anyway. To date, its the most impactful book  I’ve ever received as a gift. Thank you dear friend for your thoughtful gift#Duke you know yourself#

So what were the ideas that i got from this book? First thing i learnt was: “God almighty, the God and father of our Lord Jesus Christ created every human being and placed each one of us on earth to fulfill a SPECIFIC assignment or purpose”. None of us is an accident. Even when the circumstances surrounding our birth weren’t exactly noble, God made an informed decision to put us in out mother’s womb so we could be born on the earth to fulfill a unique assignment. For me, just knowing that God designed me for and sent me to the earth ‘on purpose and for a purpose’ has given me a sense of how valuable i am in God’s eyes , and has also contributed to my desire to make the most of every opportunity God brings my way because all those opportunities must be God’s way of ‘preparing me to fulfill my purpose’.

The second idea i got from this book is “not only does God have a SPECIFIC assignment/purpose or a ‘WHAT’ he has sent each one of us to fulfill on the earth, God also has a HOW, a WHEN and a WHERE attached to fulfilling our assignment. By ‘a HOW’ I mean, God has a blueprint of how he wants us to go about fulfilling His plan and purposes for our lives and as such to please him, its not just enough to know the ‘WHAT’ of God’s plan, its also very, very important to know and follow the ‘HOW’ of God’s plan. This idea of the ‘HOW’ of God’s plan also emphasizes the need for every child of God to be divinely guided. When we have an understanding of what it is God has called us to do on the earth, we must also seek his face from time to time to get specific instructions as to how to go about fulfilling God’s purposes.

Then comes the ‘WHEN’ of God’s plan. In this book, Reverend Hagin gives ample examples from scripture and from his own experiences as to how important it is to be in tune with God’s timing when pursuing God’s purpose for our lives. Much in the same way that the children of Israel camped where ever ‘the cloud’ of God’s presence stopped; for as long a/as short a time as it stayed on the same spot and immediately broke up camp and followed the cloud when it moved from its previous position of rest, so also we children of God under this new dispensation of God’s grace must be sensitive to the leading of the Holy Spirit in all areas of our lives (Numbers 9:22; Romans 8:14). it was therefore in this book that i learnt that one could do WHAT God wanted him/her to do, in the WAY God wanted it done but then miss God’s blessings because they failed to do it in God’s timing.

Finally, there’s the WHERE of God’s purpose for our lives. Meaning, our destinies are ‘location specific’. Though God is omnipresent (ie. is present everywhere), He has a SPECIFIC place in mind for you to do WHAT he’s called you to do, in the WAY He wants you to do it and WHEN he’s called you to do it. A good example would be how God led the apostle Paul to certain gentile nations but instructed him not to go to some other gentile nations even though God had called the apostle Paul to be an apostle to the gentiles as a whole (Ephesians 3:8; Acts 16:6). In essence, although God wants us to do specific things while we’re on earth, he also had specific details as to how He expects us to carried out our individual assignments. hence we do well to seek His face continually as too his purposes for us so that we follow closely His leading and not the plans and puroses of our own choosing.

i trust you picked out a few things too from the lessons i gleaned out of these books. if you’ve read any of the books I mentioned here or have specific books from which you picked up some life altering lessons and wisdom, please!!!! share with me in the comment box below. Watch out for part 2. Shalom!!!

  • Ik

    Probably the best compliment I’ve ever received was “It sounds like you read alot”. I’m happy ladies like you are still out there in this age of mindless followership of gossip stories and all that watery stuff. You just won yourself one more follower! lollzz…thumbs up

  • Adeoluwa

    Lovely dear. I particularly appreciate this post. It blessed me. Looking forward to the others.

  • dearodunayo

    Thanks Ifeoma! Wow what I learnt from just reading what u shared about these books is a timely reminder for me to get back into my reading habit.

    • singifeoma

      AY…I’m glad you were blessed by this post. As for getting back to ur reading habit, please do so ASAP. There’s a good reason many of the most successful people in the world read and write books; there are just somethings u can’t learn any otherbway. Thanks also for blog…:0)

Leave Your Comment Here